It still feels really weird to be a mom. I still can't believe it and feel like I am possibly on the longest babysitting job ever. It's not that I don't love Z with all of my heart, would attack anyone like a crazy person given crazy pills if they tried to do anything to her. I look at her little face while she's asleep and think she is just the most adorable thing ever, but it still doesn't feel real sometimes. I think part of it stems from the fact that I am the oldest of a crap load of grandchildren, have often been the designated family babysitter and taking care of a 4 month old can kind of be a little boring.
Don't get my wrong, she's the cutest thing ever, but still pretty boring. Things are getting more interesting. She's starting to discover the world around her and I love to see her face when we go somewhere new, but I'm looking forward to talking. And I know once she starts talking I'll be willing her to shut it up after a hours of chatting my ear off. But I can't wait to hear her little voice and all the thoughts that come with it. I'm starting to feel like I'm not running triage as much. She's getting bigger everyday and I can imagine that the first time I hear "mama" I might just cry!
Climb Mountains. Fear Sharks.
4 hours ago