Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Child Birth Pain All In Your Mind?

Oh hell no! Now that I have actually had a child I feel that I'm not totally talking out of my ass on this one. I was reading this article here, about child birth and the notion that it is all on our minds because of the way tv and movies portray it. I wonder if they ever thought to stop and ask whether or not movies portray child birth as bring crazy painful because it is crazy painful! I was only in labor for 12 hours and had an epidural for about 7 of that, so even I can't really speak to the people who have done "natural" childbirth.

I say more power to those people, and if you did it on purpose you have massive steel balls. My mom and grandmother, both nurses (NICU and maternity) didn't even bat an eyelash at me wanting an epidural. My great grandmother was a mid-wife, having mom and grandmom as nurses, I think they would have stared at me like I had two heads if I said I wanted to do it without an epidural. My mom has had 5 kids, 2 without epis and 3 with and she was so happy when she was finally able to get one and obviously didn't feel it compromised her birthing experience, which I have had the displeasure of hearing in detail.

After spending about 4 hours, laying on my side, shakes wracking my entire body and doing my relaxing breathing, it know I would have made it through, but I certainly wouldn't have been able to have a nap when the contractions got really bad. I wouldn't have been able to hold my daughter and feed her right after because I was already passing out from exhaustion just a few hours in. Child birth is painful, this isn't a construction that our post-modern world has created to force women to not enjoy the pleasant, smell the roses, this is fun, ride that is child birth. You wander into a hut somewhere where a woman is having a baby and I don't think she'll be knitting a baby blanket for her baby as she very nicely pushes.

So whatever you choose, don't try and make it seem like the other side just doesn't understand how they are missing out on something. Maybe some moms don't want a 3 hour nap while they are in labor and maybe I don't want to hear about how euphoric your non-medicated child birth was. We'll all just have to agree to disagree. Rant over!


  1. All in our minds??!! Bwahahaha! My kid was only 2 lbs - though admittedly still in the intact sac until the last moment - but let me tell you, that shit hurt. I chose no pain killers for a variety of reasons and dang. First thing I thought after the birth was 'never again'. (ok, also for a variety of reasons.)

    How is pain from, say, having skin in a very sensitive area rip apart supposed to be a construction of our post modern world? Lordy.

  2. I have no idea! I mean if you can delude yourself into thinking that you're not in pain during labor, then more power to you. But I mean it seriously hurts like nothing else, that said, I was seriously ill a month ago and I would have rather been in labor again because at least there was a baby at the end of that incredibly painful rainbow.

  3. It totally pisses me off when I hear granola people talking about how they would never use drugs and that "natural" childbirth is so much better. It makes me want to barf!

    Who would choose to experience pain?! I do not understand!

  4. P.S. that is me WNWLitigator

  5. "So whatever you choose, don't try and make it seem like the other side just doesn't understand how they are missing out on something."

    Funny, because your post reads exactly the same way re: how stupid natural childbirth is.

  6. See? There you go. It isn't enough to be all "that shit hurts, and if you choose to do it without drugs, you have bigger balls than me." Someone (anonymous) has to crawl up on their cross and feel "judged," because someone else says they wanted drugs. Because making a choice and stating your reasons for it is judging? When did she ever say natural childbirth is stupid?

    If you want to do natural child birth, good for you. Drugs or no drugs, it's your vagina, it isn't my business. But the point is, don't sit there and pretend that shit don't hurt. That is what's stupid here, along with the faux research that backs it up.

  7. Thanks Proto!! And the rest of the ladies!!